Friday, December 14, 2007

What Happened Two Months Ago.

The Scenario: A cartoon and caricature competition in school. Just when I’m rushing around because of a play we are supposed to perform in two days (and we still haven’t found a place to practice in, because space just does not exist in my school) my commercial art teacher heightens my state of near-hysteria by threatening me with painful death if I don’t submit an entry.

The Thought Process: What do I draw? A political caricature will take too long. I can’t do a comic strip, I barely have time to breathe and creating a superhero-type adventure will tax my brain to a point of no return… wait, my brain is already beyond that. What is the most unoriginal thing I can do?

The Eureka Moment: Puja ate up most of my lunch today. Mean girl. I shall have to get back at her for… aha. Ping!

The Procedure: This is the easiest part – I’ve grown up with this girl for fifteen years, I could draw her wide grin in my sleep. I have my entry! If only plays could be drawn.


The Result: I walk into school, and realise that the softboards in the lobby look different. The results have been pinned up! Gasp! I won!

The Realisation: This is a public place. People walk through this. Puja will walk through this. Puja will see this. Puja will murder me.

The Battleplan: Bahrain. Bahrain is a good place to go into hiding. I shall tell my folks I need some sun and sand and a place where I can be swathed in cloth and not be recognized.

The Wait: Day One, no angry friend assaulting me with nunchucks. Day Two, no assassination attempts. Day Three, still alive. Day four. Everyone else has seen the cartoon and Puja still hasn’t realized why they’re sniggering. Bless her. Day Five. Apocalypse.

The Denouement: Two gasps, a quivering pointed finger and a ferocious snarl later, my wronged friend proceeds to eat up my lunch for tolerating my witlessness for so many years. She does a very good job of making sure I don’t get a bite.

The Moral: Revenge doesn’t pay. Especially if you mess with a big eater.

24 kindred spirits have swallowed my rambling:

Fishy! said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Fishy! said...

*sigh*
WHY must you write so well?
You make me want to give up writing altogether, move to China and take up cockroach-breeding as a profession.

Doubletake, Doublethink. said...

@ fishy: cockroach breeding? you? please, i can't have fits right now. and i love you more with every comment :)

new age scheherazade said...

I like your friend.She sounds like me, eating up peoples' tiffin.
My dad was laughing for ages after seeing this sketch; so was I. What a grin.
Oh, and I wish you could meet inam.

Doubletake, Doublethink. said...

@ newage: i shall. and we shall get together and caricature you. watch out, you.

Fishy! said...

Why not cockroach breeding? Atleast I might be good at it, your writing gives me such an inferiority complex! :(

ad libber said...

Your posts remind me of school so much. I am not too sure whether I want to be reminded of it.

The caricature reminds me of no one. I must have forgotten each and everyone of the blessed juniors.

Bahrain is good. Bahrain is the best place to go to after you publicly seek revenge against someone physically stronger than you. I will go to Bahrain when I finally get the courage to tell Sampi she never really contributed to my Mathematical skills.

raghu said...

lol..hahhaaaaaaaaha!
u shud see my frnds caricature of gandhi..twas the limit of craziness..lol
hahah.. u write well haan. :D

heh? ok said...

oh poor kid. her idea of revenge was pretty straightforward, though. i'd have played mindgames for a month.

Macadamia The Nut said...

LOL! Brilliant carricature

Doubletake, Doublethink. said...

@ fishy: i'd like to see you do it.

@ ad libber: aw, don't tell her that now. she's going to bring a baby sampi into her family sometime soon.

@ raghu: i haven't tried gandhi. probably never will. for reasons known only to me.

@ heh? ok: really? wow. i didn't put you off recently now, did i? *paranoia sets in*

@ macadamia: :) glad you liked it.

speedpost said...

heh.
god save the queen. and puja.
"tumhari dosti mein darar aa gayi"
courtesy a.saw
heh.

Doubletake, Doublethink. said...

oh yes! i absoolutely have to write a post on dear see-saw. she'd make brilliant caricature material, too.

SPIRITed! said...

Woah!Awesome post.My sympathies are with Puja,she sounds sooo like me.

SPIRITed! said...

If you're wondering,it's me it's me!I finally have a blog!

Rajarshi said...

great post!

and as for the previous post: somewhere a clock is ticking is one of the greatest songs EVER!

Doubletake, Doublethink. said...

@ spirited: oh good. but didn't you already have a blog? or am i just being fuzzy as usual?

@ rajarshi: i agree, something eerily wonderful about it :)

SPIRITed! said...

Oh,I had one.But decided to make another just for the sake of it!

Vikrant said...

what do i say? the cartoon just says it all.

Safdar -- veil-unmasked. said...

haha. amazingly ntertaining. i wondr WHERE you get all of this from?!

Doubletake, Doublethink. said...

@ vikrant: believe me, the girl in the cartoon says even more, usually.

@ safdar: what do you mean, WHERE do i get this from? all this actually happens to me *wails*

little boxes said...

lol...its awesome!
congrats on your victory

Maximum Boy said...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

amazing eyebrows. actually,the grin says it all.

im still laughing....*hits his head on somehting*

Doubletake, Doublethink. said...

@ little boxes: victory, i think, is a relative word as far as this is concerned.

@ maximum boy: okay, now i'm feeling guilty. the eyebrows aren't that bad in real life, really.